在日常繁忙的生活中，也不要忘了放松自己的心情。下面是小编为大家带来，希望大家喜欢!
：你知道我是干嘛的吗
One night a hotel caught fire，and the people who were staying in it ran out in their night clothes.
一天晚上，一家旅馆失火，住在这家旅馆里的人穿着睡衣就跑了出来。
Two men stood outside and looked at the fire.
两个人站在外面，看着大火。
"Before I came out," said one," I ran into some of the rooms and found a lot of money. People don't think of money when they're afraid. When anyone leaves paper money in a fire，the fire burnsit. So I took all the bills that I could find. No one will be poorer because I took them."
“在我出来之前，”其中一个人说，“我跑进一些房间，找到了一大笔钱。人在恐惧中是不会想到钱的。如果有人把纸币留在火里，火就会把它烧成灰烬。所以我把我所能找到的钞票都拿走了。没有人会因为我拿走它们而变得更穷。”
"You don't know my work," said the other.
“你不知道我是干什么的。”另一个人说。
"What is your work?" “你是干什么的?”
"I'm a policeman."
“我是警察。”
"Oh!" cried the first man. He thought quickly and said, "And do you know my work?"
“噢!”第一个人喊了一声。他灵机一动，说：“那你知道我是干什么的?”
"No," said the policeman.
“不知道。”警察说。”
I'm a writer. I'm always tellings to ries about things that never happened."
“我是个作家。我总是爱编一些从未发生过的故事。”
：为抄近路走墓地
Two men were walking home after a Halloween party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs。
万圣节派对过后，两男人图个乐呵，打算抄近路穿过墓地回家。
Right in the middle of the cemetery they were startled by a tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty shadows。
走到墓地中央时，他们被从迷雾中传来的“答、答、答”声惊吓到了。
Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones。
正当两人害怕得浑身颤抖时，他们看到是个老头拿着铁锤和凿子，在一块墓石上凿着什么。
"Holy cow, Mister," one of them said after catching his breath, "You scared us half to death -- we thought you were a ghost! What are you doing working here so late at night?"
“哇塞，先生，”其中一人喘了口气说，“你把我们吓得半死啊，我们还以为遇上鬼了呢!那么晚了你在这里做什么?”
"Those fools!" the old man grumbled. "They misspelled my name!"
“那帮白痴!”老头抱怨道，“他们把我名字拼错啦!”
：真实的告解
A man walks into a confession booth and says,"I have sinned."
有一个男人走进告解室说：“我犯罪了”。
"What did you do?"asks the priest.
神父 问 ：“你做了什么?”
"I committed a murder."
“我犯了谋杀罪”
The priest says,"take a drink out of the holy cup and you will be forgiven."
神父说：“你喝一口圣杯的圣水，你就得饶恕。”
A man walks into the confession booth and says ,"I have sinned."
有一个男人走进告解室说：“我犯罪了”。
The priest asks him ,"what did you do?"
神父问他： “你做了什么?”
"I robbed six banks."
“我抢了六家银行”
The priest says, "take a drink out of the holy cup and you will be forgiven."
神父说：“你喝一口圣杯的圣水，你就得饶恕。”
Another man walks into the confession booth and says ," I have sinned ."
另一个男人走进告解室说：“我犯罪了”。
" What did you do?" asks the priest,
神父问：“你做了什么?”
"I broke the holy cup."
“我把圣杯打破了”。
