巴渠劳动人民创作了大量富有地方特色的笑话故事 ,用以讽世警行和自我娱乐。下面是小编带来的小学二年级英语笑话，欢迎阅读!
一
Contented Married Life
令人满意的婚姻生活
A man was telling one of his friends the secret of his contented married life, "My wife makes all the small decisions," he explained, "and I make all the big ones, so we never interfere ineach other's business and never get annoyed with each other. We have no complaints and no arguments."
一个男人告诉他的朋友自己婚姻幸福美满的秘密，“小事都由我妻子决定，”他解释说：“而我只管大事，我们从不互相干涉，从不生对方的气。我们从来没有抱怨、没有争吵。”
"That sounds reasonable," answered his friend sympathetically. "And what sort of decisions does your wife make?"
“听起来很有道理，”他的朋友深有同感，“有哪些事情由你妻子作决定呢?”
"Well," answered the man, "she decides what jobs I apply for, what sort of house we live in, what furniture we have, where we go for our holidays, and things like that."
“嗯，”那个人回答说：“她决定我申请什么工作，我们住什么房子，买什么家具，去哪里度假这些事情。”
His friend was surprised. "Oh?" he said. "And what do you consider important decisions then?"
他的朋友很惊奇的问道：“哦?那么你决定哪些重要事情?”
"Well," answered the man, "I decide who should be Prime Minister, whether we should increase our help to poor countries, what we should do about the atom bomb, and things like that."
“嗯，”他回答：“我决定谁来当首相，我们是否要增加对贫困国家的援助，怎么处理原******等等这些问题。”
二
约会完成进行时
A youngster asks a girl who comes to the date:" Is this your date with the young man for thefirst time? "" Too bloody right. Gee, how are you men all always asking this question?"
一个小伙子问前来赴约的女孩：“你是第一次和男孩子约会吗?”“那当然了。咦，怎么你们男孩子都爱问这个问题呀?”
小学二年级英语笑话阅读
一
主持人王宁和刘纯燕的亲属关系
Wang-Ning, News network host hastened home by motorcycle after work., his girlfriend Liu-Chunyan sat behind him on the pillion, who was dainty and cute children program hostess. Adevotedaudience recognized him suddenly, saying "hello" passionately:" Hi, you pick up yourchild back?"
新闻联播节目主持人王宁下班后骑摩托车回家，车子后面带着他的女友，娇小玲珑的少儿节目主持人刘纯燕。一位忠实的观众忽然认出了他，热情地打招呼：“嗨，把孩子接回来了?”
二
卖瓦盆的小贩
A peddler sold earthen basins in the wayside, he chanted as knocked :"Earthen basin is round,beautiful and solid, judging by the sound, they are all good." At the time of his knocking,thatearthen basin was broken into pieces with a crack爆裂声 . Lookers-on burst into the roarsof laughter. He threw the fragments碎片，残片 without extra trouble into paddy稻谷，稻田 field, but anexperienced peasant from the crowd did not let him off放过，不惩罚easily:" How the deuce 强式特指问句 can you throw them into my field? They’ll impede mygrowing crops!" The peddler who sold earthenbasins tried to explain it away promptly:"Nothing, the fragments will be converted into powder as soon as they absorbed water ."[qh]
一个小贩在路边卖瓦盆，他一边敲一边唱：“瓦盆圆又圆，结实又好看，光听这声音，就知不一般。”敲着敲着，“啪啦”一声，把盆敲烂了。围观的人一阵哄笑。他顺手把碎片扔进了稻田里，谁知人群中一个老农不干了：“你怎么能往我地里扔?这不影响我种田吗?” 卖瓦盆的小贩连忙辩解：“不要紧，瓦片见水一会儿就粉了。”
关于小学二年级英语笑话
一
吃一堑,不长一智 A Fall Into the Pit,Not Gain In the Wit
A policeman escorted a habitual criminal passing by a mountain village. Seeing containsundries store at village end, the recidivist put forward to buy a of pack cigarette. Thepolicemanponderedseized the chance to escape last time like so. Hum, Cut it out.Therefore he said to the prisoner:" You wait here, I go to buy." While coming back, he foundthe repeater missingstill. 一个警察押着一个惯犯来到一个小山村。见村头有家杂货店，犯人提出要进去买包香烟。警察想：你上次就是这样借机逃跑的，哼，少来这一套。于是，他对犯人说：“你在这等着，我进去买。”回来时，犯人还是不见了。
二
超速的理由 Excuse for speeding
A cop pulled a car over on the highway for speeding.
警察在高速上拦下一辆超速的车。
When he asked for the driver's license, the driver argued, "Speeding? But officer, I was onlytrying to keep a safe distance between my car and the car in back of me."
当他要驾驶员的驾照时，驾驶员辩称，“超速?但是******，我刚才只是想和我后边的车保持安全距离。”
